Thursday, April 23, 2009

Guardian Angel

This post is dedicated to Dolores Gamble.
She was mom's roommate @ Riddle Village for 6 weeks, and they became good buddies. Once I got here, I fell in love with her, too.

Dolores had agressive cancer that had racked her poor body, and then travelled to her brain. Three days after she got here, she lost her ability to speak. Mom became her voice, her advocate and her friend. I called them " my girls ", and ran all over the place to get them whatever they wanted.

Unfortunately, we lost Dolores yesterday afternoon. The poor thing was in so much pain the past 3 days, and went downhill rapidly. On Tuesday night, I stayed until 2am to hold her hand and wipe her forehead ... Mom and I talked to her the whole time, and one of the aides, Tory, came in and sang hymns to her.

We have another angel looking out for us now :)
She was a financial aid counselor at Widener, and had 6 kids, all who we have become close to in this short period of time. They love my mom, and are/were so thankful that they were roommates. The grandkids really like mom, and she has a ton of drawings on her bulletin board from them.
Most people would not have been able to handle this situation, but my mom is such a care-giver that Dolores became her responsibility. All of the staff here has commented on mom's unbelievable compassion & caring, and that she was the only one who could understand Dolores.

We will miss you, Dolores! You were really someone special, and mom & I will carry you in our hearts forever.
Rest in peace, and a long time from now, we'll drink Pink Squirrels together, sitting on the clouds.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Heading East

So I am heading to Media this Thursday to see my momma, and assess her situation with my own eyes.

She has been away from home since February 28th!! She is doing really well at the Riddle Village rehab, and is like the queen of the manor there. They have a gourmet chef, beauty salon, cooking classes....she's having a ball, and has also found a few church ladies that are there, too, so she is socializing full force. I don't think she realized how closed off she's been for the past 2 years in the house by herself. She enjoys being around people, so she actually is thriving in her current environment.

I will be home until the 30th, unless ak comes and gets me after 2 weeks. He's been threatening to on a regualr basis. I could be there to celebrate my 40th, who knows? Mom and I have a lot to talk about, and plans to make for the future.

Along with hanging with my main girl, I am looking forward to seeing all the good buddies :)

Ok...I am getting myself together here, and making sure ak doesn't starve while I am gone or run out of undies.

See you soon, peeps!

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Pooh's Great Escape

Last night, I remembered one final cruise tale, and it concerns our travelling companion, Pooh.

Pooh always holds down the fort in whatever cabin, room, suite or guest house we stay in when not at home base. On a few occassions, some of the maids/porters "get it", and pose Pooh in different ways when the rooms are cleaned each day. We've found him holding chocolates, flowers, a washcloth folded into a fortune cookie, and he's also been tucked in, peeking out from the pillows, or holding the newspaper at the end of the bed.

We are completely aware that many think we are nuts, and others who see Pooh as replacement for a child the we
should(?) have. Wrong, whatever - we love him, and I originally received him from my godparents when I was 4 or 5 years old. We take extraordinarily good care of him, and he has a few stiches here and there.

Anyway, this incident happened about mid-way through the cruise. We were back in the room after another boozy evening and getting ready for bed, stumbling around in the funny-silly-drunk way. Finally, we get under the covers. Ak starts watching TV,and I am reading. Just like any other night, I started rooting around for Pooh with my right hand, not taking my eyes from my book because he is always there. Well, this time he wasn't, and within 5 minutes I had checked the entire cabin, was starting to freak out, and had totally lost my buzz. Ak, always the mind of reason, tried to get me to calm down while he looked, so I sat and had a smoke and watched him do what I just did, telling him how to do it. Pooh wasn't anywhere. I grabbed the phone and called the concierge, and realize that it's 3am. I tried to be calm when explaining the problem, but I got pretty hysterical and ak had to take over. When he was done, he relayed that he was told this happens a lot, and that stuffed toys always get cought up in the bedding. They would be contacting the laundry room immediately to be on the lookout. I am sure that most of the owners of these stuffed toys are not on the cusp of 40 years of age. I was just so sad at the thought of losing something so precious and meaningful, something you cannot put a price on.

Finally, the two of us get back into bed, and try to settle down to get some sleep. We wondered out loud where he was, and I was so scared that he was in the trash, or worse, over the side. I totally cried.

The next morning, I was out of bed at 7, and in the hall looking for Michael, our porter. I saw his cart at the end of the hall, so I started down. As I approached, I thought I saw two little stuffed golden legs sticking out of the second shelf of the cart. Michael came out of the room he was cleaning just as I got to the cart, and it was Pooh! He handed him to me, and I saw that the laundry staff had made a little bed for him because he had been "running around" down there all night, and was very tired. It was too cute - they had shaped a pillow, mattress and comforter out of washcloths and pillowcases. I hugged and kissed Michael on the cheek - he totally thinks I am a crazy American broad. He got a great tip at the end :)

Needless to say, Pooh got a hero's welcome upon returning to the cabin, then got scolded for disappearing. From that day on, we made sure Pooh was out of the bed and on the couch before we left the room in the mornings.


High drama on the high seas, people :) I am thinking about making this a little story book for our godson - Pooh's Cruise Adventure. Like ak pointed out, he was in places and parts of the ship we would never see, so we could come up with something. Who knows.

Happy Weekend!

Above Photo: Pooh enjoying the beautiful orchid in the cabin this past January.

Friday, March 6, 2009

...10th grade via FaceBook

Chrissy sent me an email yesterday with this picture attached.











Apparently, this is on a classmates' FaceBook site. We were all cheerleaders.

Obviously it's Halloween, and I think it is 10th grade, JT is the sheik and we are the harem.

I also spy Debbie, Laurie, Katie and Candy.

No wonder I was buying booze at 14 - I look like I'm 40 back then!

I like that I have my face out & not covering my mug.

I don't think I even own now as much make-up that was on my face then. These were definately my hot-roller days, too.
Bad bloomers on all. I remember having 1 drawer for my cheerleading supplies: uniform, bloomers, socks, Barbie tights (for winter and night games), and colored inserts for my Nikes.

I think I see my waist, too. Wow.

Something is going on with my earrings...did we have a fan at the photo shoot?

I thought this would provide y'all with some laughs.
T.G.I.F.

Monday, March 2, 2009

...set a course for adventure, your mind on a new romance..cruise part II

I'm jumping right back into it, as I've had many calls about the enjoyment of the previous post.

Crazy Neck Brace lady
The first stop we made on the trip was Princess Cay island in the Bahamas. Princess Cruises actually owns the island, and it's a big beautiful beach with tons of lounge chairs, umbrellas, hammocks and picnic tables. All the cruise lines stop here and pay Princess some kind of fee. You can rent scuba stuff, or those huge tricycle things with the big tires that you ride on the water, and little sailboats. They come around taking drink orders, and there is a huge BBQ for everyone. It's pretty much the best it gets-laying in a hammock on a beach with a pina colada and some BBQ chicken - just heaven.
One of Regents other ships, the Seven Seas Voyager, was also there for the day. They were on their way back to Ft. Lauderdale after their 45 day Panama Canal cruise. Ak, myself, Pinky & John were walking to get some food, and ran into friends of theirs from the other ship. At first I thought it was the sun or my eyes, but I knew something was up with their hair. Both were like 5 foot tall, frosted blondes, late 50's, loud, possibly dykes, and both had a single huge streak of color on the right sides of their heads-dark green and dark blue. Not pretty or cool - just really weird. Well the one chick has a neck brace on, so of course Pinky tells her that I just had surgery, so we end up in a conversation, or rather, she just talked at me. She was like a New Yorker-all fast, and I couldn't get a word in at all. Apparantly, she got a bad rep on their ship for pulling out the neck brace for the best seats on the bus tours, boat rides, and so forth. She took her sweaty brace off and shoved it in my face, saying "people don't understand how how and nasty these things get". At this point, ak took off in the opposite direction. I didn't see him for the next 30 minutes. Next, this is what she tells me, "At least you've got your big scar to prove you've got something wrong. Everyone thinks I'm faking it." I really had no response, so I tuned her out, and then we finally reached the buffet line. She gives me her card, and tells me to email her with my doctor's name. I put it in my bag and forgot about it. Well, I just pulled the card out, and as it turns out, she is a certified crystal analyzer and some kind of iguana specialist. Too much.
Oh, so I forgot to tell you about my outfit that day. I had on my black bathing suit, black capris, a long sleeved white blouse buttoned to the neck, and a huge brown straw hat on, and I stayed in the shade. ak said I looked like a vato - a latino immigrant farmer from one of the artichoke farms around here.

high seas
As we were boarding the ship, I did think about it being hurricane season, but immeditely put it out of my mind. We had fantastic weather at sea and at each of the ports. It did rain one time during the cruise - a sun shower for 20 minutes in Grand Turk, but several nights we experienced very high and rough seas, 8-20 feet. You move back and forth in bed, and it does cause for some calamity as you are walking anywhere on the ship. Since everyone completely boozes it up, cronies are tripping and lurching left and right. The ones with canes and walkers are all set, but the others are always like - "oh, I don't have my sea legs yet", or "wow, we're really moving". It doesn't work at 10am and smooth seas, though. There are times you just have to admit you're bombed and you can't walk worth a shit, ship or no ship.
There were 4 people with Scamp scooters aboard, and they were just rude. It was like they had their own biker's club, the "Fossil Riders" or something. They should have had matching windbreakers. I found myself having to jump back in the hallways a few times as not to get clipped by a Rider. The only time us walkers had vengence was watching the Riders trying to get in and out to play in the smallish casino. We witnessed 30 to 80 point turns going on. We actually had a new odds game going at the bar, taking bets on who could get to the Black Jack or Craps tables first, and so on. Everywhere we went, we saw them, too, both on and off the boat. All of a sudden you would be in a cab at a light somewhere, and you'd look out the window, and there would be the Riders cruising by. All we could think about was another Seinfeld episode, where George has a scooter and gets chased by the old folks on their scooters. We were trying to figure out how to get them to re-enact that scene on the pool deck.
You know I'll be in a scooter one day just for writng the above.

NYE
The big night was great - black tie, delicious dinner, champagne flowing like water, and hanging out on the pool deck. It was all decorated, band playing, people dancing everywhere, and the pool was filled with balloons. Each of the balloons had a wish in it - we all got a piece of paper that they collected and put into the balloons. They let them go at the stroke of midnight, and it was gorgeous to watch them float up into the sky. It was pitch black out, all the stars were out, and the boat was lit up like a chandelier. Off in the distance, you could see 3 other cruise ships, totally lit up like we were.
Our group was on the dance floor, then doing a huge conga line, just hooting and hollering. At one point, ak and I were getting our boogie on - he was looking super-fine in his tux. I must say I looked foxy myself. He also resembled our captain a bit. Our captain was this Italian named Fabrizzio, and he had Axel's same type of body frame, only a bit taller, with darker hair and eyes. They both had the same longish hair going, and rough beards. We are used to the Viking-looking captains, with names like Erik, Klaus or Helmut. Picture the guy in the Titanic movie-big belly and white hair, Santa-like. Anyway, this crew chick (cute & young) totally busts in on our dance, grabs ak by the hands and kisses him on both cheeks, and says "Happy New Year, Capitan" in this sexy accent, shakes her ass a bit, then walks away. She was lucky she walked because I was about to cut her. ak was all up on himself, feeling all good...we are still having some good laughs about that. The funniest thing was that the real captain was on the balcony right above us watching the whole party. We were wondering when she figured out it wasn't him. Maybe she never did. She was one of the nail girls, so maybe being engulfed in acetone all day has affected her eyesight and brain size.
The entertainment on the ship as a whole went up and down, mostly down. The cruise is geared towards the elder age group, so most nights we skipped the show, hit the casino, then met up later at one of the bars. NYE was no exception. The live band at times was good, but more often than not they were like a bad SNL skit, like that married couple that sings together at the school dances. Finally, their set ended, and we headed up to the Navigator Lounge for further drinking and merriment. Upon our arrival, ak and I decide that tequila shots are in order. We head to the bar and check out what they have, and pick our poison. Next thing you know, here come a couple of the old guys from our group, and they want to do shots with us, too. We tried to warn against this, but they were undeterred. 8 shots were lined up. Within 10 minutes of downing the shots, three of them were gone - back to their cabin. One was on the dance floor gyrating like a man possesed. His wife is usually the one who dances every dance, but she had this crazy dress on that night - it was all sequins patterned like flames, and went from yellow to orange to red to black. Very Vegas showgirl, but no exposed flesh. Well, she busted out the lower back of her dress earlier in the evening, so she walked with her back against the walls all night, or with us in front of her and behind her. She was tanked, and at one point, ak and I had to help her to the ladies room. He got a flash of her panties in the back during a lurch, and burned his eyes. He just kept repeated " Why did I just see her big 'ole nude granny panties?" We headed right back to the bar for some additional shots so ak could push that image to the far regions of his mind. Thinking back, I wish we had a video recording of this stuff that night, or maybe not.
They had all kinds of snacks going, so I was all drunk-starving and grabbed some goodies. There was a DJ and decent music going, so ak and I hit the floor to some Madonna. All of a sudden he's like "Damn!" and starts looking around at the other dancers. "Someone smells like fish. Bad!" Well, it was me - I had eaten this tiny tuna fish croissant, and my breath reeked. When I told him it was me, I had to hold my hand over my mouth, and then we were just hysterical, still on the dance floor. I couldn't find an Altoid, piece of gum, or anything from anyone, so I did another shot. Booze kills the germs, right?

the gigilos
On these cruises, they usually have 2 "gentlemen" travellers who are hired to "entertain" the single ladies at the dances, chat with them at cocktails, etc., and their cruise is paid for. We all know that men die first, it's just a fact of life, so these dudes were in high demand every night. My favorite gigilo was Heinz - German, accent going, about 6'5", and like 76, little round glasses and a great set of blazing white dentures. He was an amazing dancer, and on NYE I was all buzzed up doing the Paso Doble with him, whipping my head around, then waltzing, feeling no pain. (I was TOTALLY hurting the next day, but it was worth it). The other gigilo was Mikal, this Russian guy who was short and stocky, and looked like a stone-cold killer. He scared me! The first morning when I walked around the ship, I turned the corner and he was sitting there at a table totally looking at me. I'm all thinking that he's some kind of Cold War leftover and I interupted him doing some spy mission, so he's going to push me overboard. I admit I watch way too much James Bond, and have an overactive imagination.
We really tried to get Barbara together with Heinz, or rather, I did. ak feaks out thinking about his mom "taking up" with someone. I thought they were a perfect match, but she said he had bad breath and that "old man" smell. Oh well.

rocky ride
When we finally did get to St. Barth's, we had a great time. 15 of us went to Nikki Beach and just ate and drank white wine by the edge of the sea for most of the day. Truly paradise. We then went back into town and did some shopping before getting on one of the tenders back to the ship. The sea was really choppy that day, so the ride back to the ship was very up and down and rough. There are not enough windows, so it is hot as balls sitting with about 20 others, and ak and I happened to sit by one of the deisel exhausts. It seemed to be taking forever to get back, and ak looked green from the fumes. Finally, we're back at the ship, and the tender driver just sucked at getting us lined up to rope us up and get us back aboard. He hit the side of the ship twice, and ak yells "dude, I could do better when I was 10 years old". After several attempts due to the waves, they tied the ropes, and we started to get off. Because of the waves, they had to provide assitance for every senior. ak managed to get out before me, but I heard him tell the driver how "lousy he was at controling the boat" as he got off. I finally get up there, and the two guys on the ship were holding my arms while I am still on the tender, and they almost dropped me when a wave came by, so my boy went off Philly-style, telling them "he'd kill each and every one of them if they hurt me". These guys kind of snapped to it and tightened their grips on me. Well, I got off safely, we went back to the room, cranked the A/C and took restorative naps. My poor honey has seen me through so much this year, and he is totally protective of me. I love my body guard :)

new local friends
Another cool couple that we met were actually from San francisco - Ken & Susan. Or should I say they have a house in San Fran, one in West Palm, FL, an apartment in Paris, and they rent a house in St. Barth's every winter. Someone else in our group had first met them, and brought them to dinner one night- it was a good call. Susan is one of the most beautiful older women I have ever met. Total white hair, cute bob, classy boutique-style clothing, and different eyglasses for every outfit, & perfect make-up. Ken is adorable, and another one that could fit right into the pocketbook. Also a great dresser, total Ralph Lauren style with George Hamilton tan, bright pink ties, orange ties. Here's the thing - he was like 4 1/2 feet tall. They worked out in the morning, too, and one AM we were stretching together she told me that Ken has lost 6 inches of height in his ankles due to a degerative bone disease, and that he is in pain constantly. You wouldn't know it to meet him, and he was interesting, and the kind of guy that kissed your hand. If any of you are at all familiar with the animated series King of the Hill, you may know Hank's father Cotton lost his shins in the Korean War,and is really short. We renamed Ken "Cotton Hill" of course, but out of respect, not foolery. We hope to get together with them in a few months. They are very familiar with our town, and want to meet us for dinner at the awesome Greek place downtown Los Gatos.

Ok, that's all I can do for now.
Peace out peeps :)

Thursday, February 26, 2009

... about the cruise ... part I

Ok, I admit I have been lame on posting our cruise pictures. I haven't even gone through the pics from the wedding we went to in October! Due to this laziness, I pulled out my 2 page "journal" from the cruise, so I can at least give you a few highlights to nibble on!

* Famous Author Alert:
On our previous cruises, we brought a chef along for cooking demos, special lunches, recipes, and the like. After 6 years, the group was ready for a change, so we had a best-selling author join us for this one, with him giving lectures on how he started, publishing secrets, and his personal experience in today's crazy literary market. He is 43, so he and his lovely wife were more on our age level. He spoke of how scary it was when he told his family that he wanted to quit his stable job and write full time. I was totally in awe of him - a real live author!! I was like a giddy school girl, and ak was my dad telling me to calm down before I peed my pants.
John Hart is the son of a wonderful woman we have known through Ak's mom, and have done the other cruises with. She is quite a gal - she has macular degeneration (wet) in both of her eyes, and can barely see. Recently, her doctors were able to operate on one of the eyes, and her sight improvement is extraordinary; unfortunately, that same surgery would do nothing for the other eye. John prints extra EXTRA large print manuscripts & books for her - what a good boy! If you met her, you would have no idea of her sight problems. She is completely adept at recognizing voices, and she is confident when walking, and doesn't let it slow her down. She also is a smoker, so Ak & I always spend extra time with her.
Anyhoo, I am attaching a link for John. He has already written 2 novels that were on the NY Times Best Seller list, he has his third coming out in early May, and is working on his fourth book. I highly recommend the first two - fast paced murder mysteries set in Salisbury, MD, where they are all originally from.
http://www.johnhartfiction.com/

*Our new good buddy:
Finally, after being the only youngsters by several years within this group for 6 years, our favorite couple, Jerry and Carol, had their daughter come with them on the cruise. Christin lives in Boston, and is the Irish-Catholic version of me. For example: she reads several books at one time, dotes on her parents (watching her and her mom together is like a Seinfeld episode, and very similar to Jojo and Felicia), fantastic dresser, has a strong command of cursing, and knows how to have a good time!
We had so many good laughs together, and it was nice to actually meet a new friend that you want to keep in touch with, and develop a realtionship with. Christin's ultimate goal on the cruise was to find a man that was old, rich, and terminal, so it was a veritable DisneyLand for her. Ak and I were tasked with scoping out any prospects.
Christin and I were constantly trying to scheme a way to get John's 4th book from his step-father, Bill. Bill is a true Southern gentleman, but the attention of 2 Yankee dolls could not part him from his advanced book copy. Bill could possibly be as old as Moses, but he is one of those precious "elders" that you want to take home in your purse. Although I sometimes had alterior motives, I genuinely enjoyed talking with him. He celebrated his 86th birthday while on board. Christin flew directly to the cruise, but came back with our group on the bus. We dropped her off in Jupiter, FL, to visit with her dad. As we watched her getting her luggage, we commented how funny it was that we had the same luggage - haha! We got back on the road, and 15 minutes hadn't passed before Carol made her way back to our seats to say that Christin ended up with one of our suitcases - haha - and that we'd have to meet her and pull a switch the next day. All of the adults were all like "oh, you have to drive 1 1/2 hours to meet tomorrow, how awful," and "what a shame", when I was pretty excited to see her again! Everything worked out perfectly at our luggage exchange the next day, and it was great to see her! She headed back to Boston the next day where lots of snow fell, and she hasn't been heard from since. jk.

*CODE BLUE
One evening after dinner, Axel, myself and Christin were at the casino bar (another designated smoking pit), and suddenly an alarm sounded, followed by the announcement of a "Code Blue". We were quite enthralled, and kept at our Australian bartender Ricky until he admitted that a "guest" was down, and possibly dead! I felt like I was in a surreal episode of ER where all doctors and nurses were in formal dress. As it turns out, a poor passenger was very sick and was in a diebetic coma, probably from the desserts. We actually changed direction to get him to the closest hospital, and it completely changed the itinerary for the rest of the cruise! We had been heading to St. Barth's, where we were going to be there from 9am to 11pm, giving us the only opportunity to have dinner off of the ship. Also, St. Barth's is akjn's favorite Caribbean destination, so we were so happy to have so much time there. Well, we ended up going a few days later, and only had from 9-5pm.......there was some mumbling and grumbling from everyone about that.
Barbara was on the same ship this summer for 40 days, doing Dubai, the Arab Emirates, and those other scary places over there, and 3 people, all dudes, croaked on the cruise. One got off with the wife and flew home, the others were kept on ice in the galley until the end of the cruise. That is surely the only downer to these cruises - the chances of one of the fossils taking the next step is extremely high.

* Hulking Out:
I was on my usual cocktail of regular meds, plus the ones for the neck surgery, then add some tropical alcohol on top. Ak has mentioned in the past that I tend to get pissed-off faster on Vicodin, as though it blocks out my patience meter. I think we were in St. Marteen, and ak, Barb & I were shopping and looking for a good lunch place. It was REALLY hot, too. We found a cafe, and had a delightful lunch with lots of lovely wine to top off the pill cocktail. Then we were brought complimentary homemade banana liquer with the bill, and we were trying to decide whether to pay in Euros or Visa. Ak is brilliant with accounting and currency exchange, so we always rely on him to figure things out. For some reason, my math-challeged skills tried to match his, and failed miserably when I came up with my solution. Well, I didn't take my failure too well in my vicodin-ed out, hot, wino-d + banana-liquored mood, and I totally Hulked Out on the two of them. Told them I'd meet them back at the ship and cruised out of the restaurant. Tried to get a cab back to the ship, but the cabs were set out for groups of people, not individual riders. Basically, my trip back would be $25, compared to $5 if I had 2 more people with me. With my tail between my legs, all bitter, I walked back towards the restaurant until I ran into my peeps, and informed them that the only reason I came back was economic - the single taxi ride was a rip off, and I needed them to lower the rate. Well, we all fell out at that point, laughing and grabbing our bellies at the sheer stupidity of it all! Now I was back to normal and properly focused, I was able to shop in the gorgeous Murano glass store, which restored me to my regular self.

*The Houston Ladies:
Again, as smokers who get corraled into room corners, the back part of the pool deck, bars, etc., we got to meet so many wonderful characters. Two absolute sweethearts that we met were Allison & Shirley from Houston. They are best friends, and both divorced well, so they live together in a huge mansion. They had the biggest cabin on the ship, and invited us to a cocktail party one night in their cabin. The cruise supplies all the appetizers, bar and bartender. We had a blast! Axel fell immediately into deep conversation with Bill, a retired NYC detective who worked on John Lennon's murder case. Allison actually lived in the Dakota from 1966-69. Ak and I love stuff like that!
These ladies were the tops, and we will defiantely be keeping in touch with them.

*The (Older) Newlyweds:
Another smoking couple we met had actually gotten married 3 days prior to the cruise. She looks like a Barbie doll that has aged VERY well, and the husband was a silver fox, and very tall. He worried me, though, because a good gust of wind could take him right over the side. We met them the first day at the pool bar, and she asked about the scar on my neck, and said she had some cream from her last "plastic" that would make the scar disappear - I was all ears!
Early the next morning, I was having my celebratory cigarette after my 7 mile walk, when she came out to join me. She looked fine - flowy bathing suit robe thing, hat, and huge black sunglasses, just the outfit I wear to the pool. We exchanged morning pleasantries, and then she pushed up her sunglasses, and HOLY SHIT!! Black eye, cut across nose, and whole forehead bruised!
Apparantly, after closing down one of the bars the previous night, they cut through the pool deck to get back to their room, and he started to fall over a deck chair, so she jumped in front of him to cushion his fall (he would have broken like match-sticks), and ended up with a concussion and broken nose. Happy Fricking Honeymoon! You really couldn't tell when she had her glassees on. Of course I ask her what the ship's doctor gave her, and Doc only gave her 3 Tylenol with Codeine (all I could picture was that dude Doc from the LoveBoat who had no skills). I told her to buzz me if she needed anything. About 3 days later, ak and I were waiting for one of the elevators, when the doors opened in front of us, The elevator was full, but I saw a flash of blonde amid the gray, so I said "hey _____" (I feel so bad as we completely forget their names), and right away she yelled out "Joanna, I need you. Room _____". I immediately returned to our cabin, prepared her a goodie bag from my pharmacy, but then realized I was drunk and forgot their cabin #. I felt really bad. By the time I woke up the next day, I remembered, and headed up to the deck with the second largest cabins aboard. I rang their doorbell, and the maid answered, and was totally giving me the eye and the room block. I called out "It's Joanna with a care package" and I heard my girl say to the maid "That's my sister, please get what she has, please". Two days later, her and her husband were at dinner, and stopped by our table. Ak and I were amazed-she looked fantastic, and mostly all of the bruising had subsided. She thanked me over and over - I told her she didn't ever have to thank me, that I understood pain management, and that I was so happy to have been able to help.
I still can't believe we can't remember their names!

OK - this is long, and I have a few more notes, so we will break it into part one and two.
Stay tuned for PART II, sometime soon......

One more very recent funny from ak's mom.....She and her best friend from Germany spent this past weekend in South Beach. They had dinner Sunday night the the new restaurant in Versace's mansion.
http://florida-travel.suite101.com/article.cfm/the_history_of_the_versace_mansion
Ak's mom asked to speak to the manager to inform him of the following: although the food was spectacular, the service was not up to par. They didn't get butter knives, and Gudren needed a finger bowl, napkin or something for her hands after eating stone crabs. The manager starts giving excuses, to which she replies "that is not my problem. my friend and I are writers from a German magazine, and we are going to write about the private dinner we had here tonight". She also told him how displeased she was that most of the mansion was closed due to a private party, and that wasn't dislosed to her when making the reservation. Needless to say, all their booze was comped + dessert, and the manager gave them a private tour of the entire mansion! She called us after they got back to the hotel, all buzzed up and excited, as she knew how proud I would be of her for her manipulation skills, and my motto of believing something makes it true. She has requested a set of business cards for all of us, fake last names and fake German magazine. I am on it!!!

... xoxo Jojo ...

Saturday, February 14, 2009

HAPPY ST. VALENTINE'S DAY!

HAVE A LOVE-FILLED 24 HOURS!
XOXO AKJN

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Florida Today, January 11, 2009

* it's tiny, but check out who is mentioned in the last paragraph :)

* apparently we also made the Space Coast magazine with our picture included, too.

* too funny ... once a year for 3 weeks we hit the social scene with ak's mama in FL, and we end up in the paper and a local magazine.

* no wonder we need to recuperate and don't come out of the bat cave very often the rest of the 49 weeks.

later :)

Monday, January 26, 2009

Hair Raising Wii Action




Well, I cut my hair!













Here's how it all started ......

There was a dancer, Susanna, on the cruise with this cut in blonde, same curls and texture as my hair.
I checked her out the whole cruise, and took pictures of her hair. I think she believed that I was some lesbian hair stalker by the end of the trip.

I then got AK's & Barb's opinions, and the next thing you know, our whole group of 20 put in their 2 cents, so it was decided right then that I would be cutting my locks.
I realized I was ready for a change, and had a hair appt. already scheduled for 2 days after we got back to Cali.

Well, here I am with my new hair-do (if you look closely at my neck on the left, you can see my surgery scar). It is taking some getting used to, but I am liking it more and more as each day passes. I am finding it hard to use less products ... I have had the long locks since college, and am so used to using a ton of shampoo, conditioner, mousse, etc., and old habits are hard to break! I am posting the one picture now, and will put up more as I get better at styling my mop. I straightened it today, and I kind of resemble the Beatles in the 60's.

Thanks for all the support and hand holding - I got the super thumbs up from the 2 moms plus Chrissy & Kelly, so that was enough for me to know I had done a good thing. My hairdresser actually had a bottle of wine for me if I needed it during the appointment, and when AK picked me up, he wasn't sure if I would need a stretcher, pills, or booze to get me home.

He actually got me a late Christmas present while I was getting chopped - a Wii with the Wii Fit package. I love it!!!! It is so cute, and actually very motivating. I can add my walking to my daily activities, along with any other activity that is not within the actual Fit disc. AK & I created our avatars (precious), and both have Activity Logs that show our progress, and show us how far or close we are from reaching goals we set within our profiles. Too cool, and it was wonderful that he thought of it to distract me from every mirror in the house!!

Still working on cruise pictures and commentary - it's been crazy since we got home!

Happy Monday, and a good week to all .... later peeps!


P.S. Happy 79th Birthday, Mom! You're the best, & we can only hope to age as beautifully and gracefully as you have!
Love you!

Monday, January 12, 2009

Back on Land / Annie Leibovitz

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!
ALL THE BEST TO EACH OF YOU IN 2009!

We have returned from the cruise, and are enjoying a week in Melbourne Beach with Axel's mom prior to returning to Cali. I will be posting about the cruise later - there is almost too much to tell, and so many funny incidents that have to be written about. I kept a small journal for each days adventures, and sometimes misadventures, so I wouldn't forget a thing! But for now, here's something yummy.....

We got back on January 9th, and almost immediately upon arriving at Barbara's house, we had to gussie-up again for the opening of the Annie Leibovitz : Women http://www.nytimes.com/library/photos/leibovitz/interview.html show at the Brevard Art Musuem. Barbara is a Trustee of the musuem, and actually was an original founder of the museum in 1978 with a few other women. They bought the old Melbourne Police station, and literally cleaned, scrubbed, painted the building, and started to commission paintings. Post Secret http://postsecret.blogspot.com/ had an exhibit here not to long ago, so they have come along way!

From the Musem website:
Today, almost 30 years later, the Brevard Art Museum has tripled the exhibition area and provides modern technical conservation methods and storage areas as our collection increases in size. Significant loan collections can be brought to the Museum. In addition, children and adults now enjoy the opportunity to study and create art in the Museum School at the Renee Foosaner Education Center which housed a portion of the original Museum.
Check out more at http://www.brevardartmuseum.org/

The exhibition was amazing, and since it was the opening, only museum members & their guests were invited. Annie's pictures were inspiring, shocking and thought provoking, & led to some lively discussion. We were no longer dragging and complaining how tired we were!

That's all for now....we are currently cooking our traditional Christmas goose dinner, since we were not together for the actual holiday.
Bon Appetite, I say!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Merry, Merry Christmas 2008!

Thinking of you this holiday season!
xoxo akjn westside


Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Scarred Diva

OK - All surgery is complete for 2008!
This neck surgery and recovery definately takes the cake this year. Thank goodness we go on the cruise in a couple of weeks - I totally deserve some pampering!

I know I sent emails saying that it was a success and I was doing well, blah blah, but it was actually the opposite. The surgery WAS a success, but the "doing well" was far from the truth.

I have a pretty large scar on the front of my neck, top to bottom. This was quite a shock as we were told the incision would be in the wrinkle - the fold where your neck meets the body. I've been wearing a scarf as it has been freaking everyone out, including the UPS man last Friday, poor man. I know it will fade and be fine, but it really seems to bother anyone who looks at me.

The muscle relaxer that they gave me induced major migraines, which imitated my symptoms prior to surgery, which lead me to think that something went wrong, and that would require another proceedure, making me quite anxious.

My surgeon might be brilliant, but he has no "warm & fuzzy" side. I need the warm/fuzzy from any doctor, especially one cutting my neck open. There have been some bad phone calls to his office and I have possibly yelled at each member of his staff - I'll have to check my notes. Needless to say, they respect the Jojo now, and I get call backs immediately.

You can imagine that these things don't promote a good recovery environment. I have been so tense that my entire upper back feels like I've been beaten with a baseball bat.

Yesterday everything came to a head, and I finally was able to get my point across to my surgeon, and he immediatley switched my meds, assured me that some of the freaky symptoms are normal, and I actually got a tiny bit of warm/fuzzy from him. I think he realized that he dropped the ball a bit on info regarding my recovery - I totally called him out on it.

Meanwhile, my poor ak has stood by and watched this, supporting me, taking care of me, and trying to get me calm so I can heal. God Bless him, he has had his hands full, and I am a handful when I am healthy and happy! We are so glad we have turned the corner, and I am so happy to say that I am feeling good, and have been able to walk a few times, and I am letting the Chritmas spirit back in :) Thanks honey - I do love you so!

As always, emails, texts and calls from friends make all the difference to both ak and I. My mom has been amazing, and one of the only ones able to "talk me down" when I really get going. She is my girl! Thanks, mama! The best has been getting back in regular contact with our college buddy Dean, living in NYC. He is one of the funniest people we know, and also one of the kindest. The mischief we made in college is legendary, and cannot be repeated without subpoena; however, I might be persuaded to let you in on some of our receipes that we are still all cooking to this day. Thanks, Dean, from your big 'ole donkey Girl Scout!

The hospital experience was one of the worst, and it is depressing that I have so many other experiences to compare it to. This was brutal, though. Here is just 1 example:
The TV was broken in my room. No big deal as I had my book and Iphone, but they would send in Maintenance occasionally to try and fix. Hospital tvs all work through this huge remote that is on your bed. This remote also has the call button for the nurse. Long story short, my remote got disconnected, I had to go to the bathroom, no response to my repeated buzzing (I had no clue it wasn't working), and no response to my scratchy/sore throat calling out from the room. I needed the IV disconnected to get to the bathroom, and was specifally told to call for assistance out of bed as well. Well, it got to the point where I was going to piss the bed. Therefore I had no choice but to get up, stretch the IV as far as it would go, hook my foot on to the trash can, drag it over to finally pee in it. You can be sure that everyone on that floor heard me cussing out the entire nurses station, once I found out I could unplug my IV from the wall - information that would have been useful prior to the incident. The Philly got out of the cage in a BIG way. Just delightful.

ENOUGH!!!
Out of the ashes, the phoenix rises........akjn is moving on happily towards the holiday, cruise, and hanging in Florida for a few weeks! Boxes have been arriving in the mail, and we have been getting great Christmas cards, too! The weather just turned chillier the past day or so, so although it is far from snow it at least feels as Chrstmas outside as it's going to get.

This is our biggest birthday month, too!
Birthday shout outs to: Georgie, Uncle John, Aunt Irene, Nicky & Evan, Andrew, Mark, Chuck, Kelly, Cindy, Tom, Bill and Ericka!
HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY, PEEPS!

Sunday, December 7, 2008

'Tis the Season

Wow - December is here! It truly amazes me how time flies, as I can recall as a child Christmas taking FOREVER to arrive.

The household has been buzzing a bit, as we are in preparation for my surgery Tuesday, Christmas, and then our cruise at the end of the month.

  • All packages have been sent.*
  • All labels, stickers and cards are in assembly formation for completion during recovery.
  • We have an outline of our Christmas dinner, and are currently browsing cookie recipes.
  • We have started putting items in the guest room for the cruise.

* Schmidts - your presents will be at Judith Lane for pick-up with Felicia :)

So, we are in good shape. I am also getting my side oft he bed ready for recovery with books, magazines, and the like. Wish me luck, peeps!

We were pumped by the Eagles game this morning. Just fabulous! We are so happy to be seeing this late season turn around.

More later - just got a call that my buddy Julie is stopping by :)

Friday, November 21, 2008

Mid-November

So, I've noticed a decrease in the blog postings from our posse, and have had one site officially close!!??!! It's disappointing, but I guess bound to happen. I've been told to check out facebook repeatedly, so I'll check that out in a few weeks. I enjoy this forum and style so much.

Anyway, time for a little update: I will be having the neck surgery to repair the 3 herniated discs on December 9. It has to be done, and I'd rather do it now than in the New Year. I am looking forward to starting 2009 ready to go, and putting a tough 2008 behind me. The neurosurgeon has assured us that I will be recovered & able to fly to Ft. Lauderdale on 12/29 for the cruise with Axel's mom, which had to be able to happen. I didn't want the surgery to be hanging over the trip.

akjn will be spending the holidays here @ home - nice and quiet. I am so excited that the Eagles are playing on Thanksgiving. ak found a BBQ joint over in the East Bay that fries whole turkeys, so we have an order in for our holiday meal - total score!

f. footbal is killing me! I have been in last place since Week 2. Pathetic, I know. Whatever - we love watching and are just trying to ride this crazy roller-coaster of a season through to February 1st.

Big Congrats to Chrissy & Eric on their house settlement - finally! How sweet it is!! We can't wait to see it!

Ok, now a little picture show:
Neighbor's cat Oliver. A little visit to our yard.















Clematis vine flower/plant from front patio.














Walking pic - Los Gatos Creek Trail, reservoir view



















Walking pic - view of creek from bridge, end of our road



















Walking pic - jr. high track up the road, early morning



















Me and Nicky before hitting Linvilla Pumpkinland 10/22/08

















Later! I hope someone comments/posts :)
HAPPY THANKSGIVING




Friday, October 31, 2008

No Tricks, Just a HUGE Treat!


Way to go, Phillies!

PHINALLY ... PHANTASTIC ...
PHUN ... PHILADELPHIA!

Wish I was there for today's parade, but I am so glad I was home for the first 3 games!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Any Given Sunday / Monster Park / Gang Fight (almost)

E - A - G - L - E - S

EAGLES!!!!!!


Ak and I got a special treat Sunday.....tickets to the Eagles/Niners game!
The tix were from my Fantasy Commissioner's father-in-law, and they were sweet, 5 rows in from the field. We sat with the brother-in-law and his friend Javier. A good time was had by all, of course, and we made some new friends along the way.

Part I
We were happily surprised to see the number of Philly fans in attendance. Lots of McNabb and Westbrook jerseys, and I even saw 2 Cunningham jerseys, and 1 T.O. Eagles jersey, and finally 1 Phillies shirt and 2-3 Phillies ball caps. Nice.

I rolled up in my Eagles jacket - old school green, carrying a 2' x 1' sign with the Eagles logo & stuff on the front, and then I customized the back in case of any TV exposure. It said: Go Eagles / Hi Mom / Hey Plumstead Inn/ Media - Everybody's Home Town, and was generously and tastefully sprinkled with cute football stickers. I waved it around the whole time, but not aggressively or obnoxiously. Everyone around us commented on my cool customization, and asked about Media, the Plummy, etc..

The peeps that we sat around were very cool - 2 Eagles fans behind us in full attire, and the guys next to us on both sides have had their seats passed down en familia since the dawn of time. In front of us was a dude from Jersey who knew all about the Delco area...apparently he has an ex from Conestoga. The dude right next to Ak, Matt, was a dead ringer for Drew Granger, except a CA style Drew - he and I sang the Eagles Victory song a capella together. Akjn fell in with the crowd, and within no time we were doing tag team beer runs of 12-14 cups at a time. We were invited to a tailgate afterwords, too.


The hussies danced on the riser in front of us after a Niner TD. There are 7 or 8 of them in a row - you can imagine the comments that are flying around :)



The game was AWESOME....of course there were the ever present ups and downs, and heart stopping moments that our Birds always provide for the faithfull, but they triumphed, so it was even sweeter representing for the boyz on the road.


Part II
Needless to say, we imbibed heavily on delicious $12 Hefeweizens, and were pretty shitty by the end of the game. Ak actually ate stadium nachos - I haven't seen him eat that crap since college. We also gnawed on a 1 foot hot dog the whole game, knowing that we had stepped on it the 10 times we dropped it on the ground. Delicious! Floor spice is always nice!! We had fun shouting out with all of the Eagles fans we passed on the way back to the car. We decided against the tail gate and more drinking, opting to get home and into our pj's to watch the next game.

We make it to the car, and slowly begin the long process of extracting ourselves safely from the stadium. Monster Park (aka: Candlestick Park, 3 Comm Park, or Paradise Park -- pick whichever name you like) is in a bad neighborhood, and you must weave throught it to get back on the interstate. So there are four lanes s l o w l y making our way down this sketchy street, when all of a sudden the car in front of us stops, even though there is space to keep moving forward. Then we notice the car in front of them stopping, and then all of the people in the cars got out. They were predominately Latino, dressed Cholo-style - even the 2 girls. Ak taps on the horn, rolls down the window and asks them to move their car, but they ignored him. At this moment, our beer buzzes and Philly attitudes activated, like superhero powers. Ak leans on the horn and stretches his head out the window and says louder - how about you guys move your cars and fight later, and we got multiple middle fingers back on that one.

The next thing you know, I've got my window down, telling the chicas that they need to get their men under control and back in their cars because I need to get home to my 3 kids (?????), and one of the guys said F-you, I got kids too, and then everything kind of got aggressive and obnoxious. Ak and I were both arm waving and finger-pointing out of our windows and yelling all kinds of trash talk, and then both Cholo cars kind of forgot they were fighting each other, and all focused on us. THANK GOODNESS a guy in the lane next to us beeped, and I yelled "go baby", and we were able to shoot into the right lane and take off with a green light. I looked back right as we were merging and one of the chicas had her hands on the back passenger window, running all screaming and cursing. We were totally fired up, and by the time we got to the on-ramp we were cracking up, and then when we got home, we realized that we were pretty lucky that the light had been green. Had it not, they would have definately caught up with us, and I would have had to fend them off with my inhaler.

Everynow and then, a stranger gets the pleasure of dealing with akjn doing our bad cop/bad cop routine. This behavior is usually only reserved for airline employees & strangers, but Sunday was special, we had huge beer balls, AND the victory, so we went for it.

Good times, good times.

Anyway, I was thinking about all of you guys, and knew that we were all watching the game together :)

I hope the Birds can keep it up.

Niners mascot "Sourdough Sam", or as our new friends call him " Sexual Harrassment Sam". He is definately wierd - I gave them a hard time about it, saying that he can't hold a candle to the Majestic,
Patriotic Eagle :)




How 'bout the Phillies, too? SUPER! I might need an emergency Phillies hat sent - we lost a box of caps in the move, and my Phillies is missing.



Take it light, and get blogging, people! Summer vacation has been over for a while!

Thursday, September 25, 2008

No More Work!

I officially resigned from my job yesterday. My co-workers were surprised and upset, but at the same time, they all knew that I need this time to get back 100% physically and mentally. I was told that I always have a home there, and that they would have me back in a heartbeat. That means a lot.

Unfortunately, a side effect from the back surgery has come to light - I have a few herniated discs in my neck that are causing circulation problems in both my arms and hands, aggravated by my laying on my back for the past 4 months. I see a nuerosurgeon next week to determine therapy or surgery.......please say a little prayer for me that this situation can be resolved with therapy. I don't think akjn can go through another surgery!

Other than that, all is well. The weather is great, and we are preparing for a trip East next month. We have a wedding in Kill Devil Hills, NC the weekend of 10/18, then I will be heading up to Media to visit mama and the good buddies. I can't wait to see my mom!!! It's been almost a year.

OK, heading out to turn in my keys!
Have a great day, peeps!

Monday, September 15, 2008

MNF :(

Damn....we we so close tonight!
I hope this is not the beginning of another disappointing season....

Steelers next week - another nail biter.






Just back from the eye doctor - I was experiencing blurriness when reading up close.
Results: I am heading for bifocal glasses & contacts country within the next year. For now, he recommended the $10 reading glasses that you get from a pharmacy. I went to Walgreens, and unfortunately the selection of glasses for the strength I needed was very poor, so I ended up with some large black 1950's frames. Looking good!

Later, peeps!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

I'm Tired

The title of this post needs is to be sung in place of I'm lonely in the INXS song 'What You Need'.

As of today, I have completed five 4 hour days back at work.
It sucks!

  • My manager quit and the replacement starts mid-September. She is already micro-managing me via email.
  • The girl who took my old job has been out 2 of my 5 days with her sick kids.
  • There are 2 new empoyees working for me and I can't remember their names.
  • 6 residents have gotten together and filed a class action lawsuit against the property and the company for "causing the inhabitability of their home due to the construction".
  • 1500 of the residents are maintaining a bitch blog/google group. We have been advised not to join as it may interfere with the lawsuit.
  • On Monday, a resident threatened to go back to his apartment, get his gun, and come back down to shoot us all. Lovely, isn't it?

I have regressed in physical therapy and have to take the vicodin again. I have actually gone backwards, and am back in the pool for less intense exercizing and stretching. I am very upset over this, as I was progressing with flying colors and getting a lot of mobility back. My therapist thinks that this regression is due to a combination of: my scar tissue hardening from all 3 surgeries (it is affecting the way I walk, can't get comfy laying down anymore), tweaking a muscle, and stress from the job. She can't believe how suddenly I deteriorated. I was so scared about the pain that I asked the surgeon to do an mri to ensure I didn't break anything back there. He assured me that short of a bus hitting me, my screws and disc would stay in place.

My first day back was last Wednesday.
When I got home, ak said that I have that look again.
What look, I asked?
He answered, the work look, where you seem pissed-off, constipated and about to cry all at the same time.
I asked him to slap it right off of me.
This surgery may be a blessing in disguise, as it has allowed me to step back and really take a look at myself. I don't like what I see, and hate the way work completely takes over me and changes my personality. I realize now that my priorities have gotten completely out of order, and how the office negativity eventually creeps into my personal life no matter how hard I try to shake it off....I am sitting here pissed-off right now!

Ok, enough!!
Everybody have a great Labor Day weekend! :)
Peace out.......

Anyway, at least it is only 4 hours a day right now :)

Monday, August 18, 2008

Happy Birthday, Newlywed!


...and the good times keep rolling for Chrissy this month!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DOLL!

...oh, I just wanted to add that I start back at work this Wednesday. I am on 1/2 days for 2 weeks, and then will be re-evaluated for full days. Not too happy about leaving the cave, but it must be done.
In physical therapy news, I have graduated from the pool to "land". I have been doing a lot of work with Pilates machines - I like them very much! I've been continuing with my walking every day, and have been adding exercises to my home repertoire.
Finally, I went to my Fantasy Football draft yesterday, and feel very confident in my team. akjn is also just looking forward to the beginning of football season. ak put a sweet program on my iphone called Draft Central 2008 for .99, and I that is all I walked into the draft with. All players are listed by rank and also name, and as you and your league are picking, you just mark(tap) that person going to your team, or someone else's, and then the pick shows up as drafted on all of the main lists. It also lists your team exclusively. For less than a dollar, this little application was worth it.
ok, that was it :)
Peace Out!